The No-Po Translator

A few of my single women friends were sharing dating stories and discussing the  inventory pool of eligible men. One friend was curious about two guys she had recently met. She described him as saying ”he didn’t want to complicate things in a relationship.” My other friend quickly jumped in and translated that and said, ”oh, that means he’s married.” She then wanted to read his text which said he was “out w the guys” and was convinced he had a girlfriend or was involved. The second guy was putting off inconsistent vibes- super friendly and affectionate one week and radio silent the next. My friend summed that up and said, ”oh, sounds gay.”

When we feel insecure about something, there’s lots of room for interpretation and we all know that dealing with No-Po’s makes everyone very cautious. We intuitively know something is missing, we put up with their vague responses to our direct questions and their delayed timelines in hopes they might change or that you are entitled to the truth. 

It’s time you learn how to quickly decipher the truth - my No-Po Translator can help:

No-Po: “I want to take this proposal and review it with my committee.”

Translation: Your proposal will help me set up and build a criteria for how we will evaluate all vendors

No-Po: “I can secure budget by next quarter.”

Translation: I haven’t had access to budget since the early 80’s

No-Po: “Our meeting has been rescheduled for two weeks.”

Translation: The higher execs never give me time, they have their own problems and I’m staying out of their way and under the radar

No-Po: “I make all the decisions in this department.”

Translation: It’s just me in this freakin place, noone really has any clue of what I’m doing all day

No-Po: “It’s no point trying to contact him, he’ll just ask you to call me.”

Translation: That’s all my boss needs is to deal with slimy salespeople and vendors all day- that’s my job here

No-Po: “Your product is spot-on with the market and our needs- very impressive as you guys are way ahead of the curve on your products.”

Translation: Can you get me a job with your company?